Time and Time Again

Time. Management.

These two words trike fear in the heart and mind of every writer. (Just like a red pen)

...At least, that's what I hope. I seriously doubt I'm the only one.

If you follow my blog (THANK YOU, by the way) then you know I've been M.I.A. for almost two months. The blame for this could be cast in many directions: School, Social Life, Reading, and...you know, WRITING my own book.

But the real culprit here is me. Or, more specifically, my inadequacy to use my time wisely. The blame - the fault - is All. On. Me.

I'm someone who likes to be footloose and fancy-free, but I also enjoy a functioning plan (as long as it doesn't involve stress). These two qualities push against each other, creating friction until I'm left with a lifestyle I'm not happy with. I hate schedules because they become too repetitive, and I get strained from doing the same exact process every single day.

(If any of you have tips for me or want to share your own time management hacks, please do!)

For now, I'm just working on waking up earlier.

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AND NOW

FOR THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR

(probably not)

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ABOUT 

MY NANOWRIMO NOVEL

I know most people could care less...

BUT the haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate hate and I'm just gonna share a bit about it anyway, anyway! Oh!

When people outside of the internet ask what my novel is about, I go blank.

(How do I tell them without giving away the major plot twist?)

And, surprisingly, *people* ask me this A LOT.

*WE INTERRUPT THIS POST WITH AN EXCERPT FROM LILY'S ACTUAL RESPONSE TO THIS QUESTION*

Person: "What's your book about?"

Lily: "Um, well...There's two girls. And it's sci-fi-"

Person: "Oh, sci-fi! That must be tricky!"

Lily: "Yeah..."

Person: "So, what's it about?"

Lily: "Uh, a rebellion. But that's not what it's about actually!"

*confusion*

Person: "Okay..."

Lily: "It's sort of about humanity. What makes a human, human? What is right and wrong? It also dives into a deeper message of not believing everything you read or what someone tells you on the internet. But, you know, that's not even really what it's about. There's so much more and I don't even know where to start."

Person: "That's...nice" *walk away. walk away*

*THIS IS A TOTALLY REAL CONVERSATION THAT ABSOLUTELY HAPPENED AND WAS PROBABLY MUCH WORSE IN LILY'S HEAD THAN IN REAL LIFE*

You see, I have a hard time sharing my story (with anyone). I just let my mom read my first chapter a few weeks ago, and it was almost painful to sit there and wait while she read. It's not ready. It's not the best I can make it. 

So NO, I'm not going to let you read it. 

I'm truly sorry.

This story is my first actual novel, and I hope to have it published one day. That is why I'm not sharing my characters, or my plot, or my thoughts. The story is in a very vulnerable stage right now and if something were to stunt my excitement for it I might never finish it. I don't want your opinion. I don't want you to see my frail soul until I can shape it into something strong enough to be touched and loved and disliked and thrown at walls. It's not ready for that yet.

Yet.

It kills me sometimes not to share my story. I love it so much, and I want others to as well. 

I just also know that it needs some TLC before being thrust out into the world.

So, until then, you probably won't hear anymore from me on that subject. I long for the day I can share with EVERYONE the story I've come to adore. 

And I hope you will adore it too. 

(Book reviews coming soon...probably)